teachhub-blogs

 

Teacher JokesFor a quick giggle, we've compiled and concocted 20 side-splitting (and maybe a little corny) teacher jokes to laugh our way through next week.

* What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws. The other is a pause at the end of a clause.

*Why do geographers find mountains so funny?
Because they’re hill areas.

*What pencil did Shakespeare write with?
2B.

*Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
At the bottom.

*Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/4th.

*What did they do at the Boston Tea Party?
I don’t know, I wasn’t invited! 

* What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?
Summer!

* Why does the principal keep talking to me about having more “arty eye” (RTI)? I teach reading, not art.

*Does it count as differentiated instruction if I print their worksheets in different colors?

*Teacher: ‘Craig, you know you can't sleep in my class.'
Craig: 'I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could.'

* Teachers who take class attendance are absent-minded.

*What do you call a teacher without students?
Happy

*Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of
Pupil: Life imprisonment!

*Pupil: I don't think I deserved zero on this test!
Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you!

*Teachers deserve a lot of credit. Of course, if we paid them more, they wouldn’t need it.

*Where do door-makers get their education?
The school of hard knocks

*What do you call a teacher without students?
Broke … oh wait, that’s a regular teacher

*Teacher: Why have you got cotton in your ears, do you have an infection?
Pupil: Well, you keep saying that things go in one ear and out the other, so I am trying to keep them it all in!

*Kid comes home from first day at school. Mom asks, “What did you learn today?” Kid replies, “Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.”

*Pupil: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not
Pupil: Good, because I didn't do my homework

* There is one person in our district who is all about “No Child Left Behind”
Who’s that?
The bus driver

*What kinds of tests do they give witches?
Hex-aminations

*Teacher: You copied from Fred's exam paper, didn't you?
Pupil: How did you know?
Teacher: Fred's paper says "I don't know" and you put, "Me neither"!

To end the summer with a giggle, I've compiled and concocted 20 side-splitting (and maybe a little corny) teacher jokes to laugh our way back around to the weekend.

 

*What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?
Summer!

 

*Why does the principal keep talking to me about having more “arty eye”? I teach reading, not art.

0

 

Teacher JokesFor a quick giggle, we've compiled and concocted 20 side-splitting (and maybe a little corny) teacher jokes to laugh our way through next week.

* What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws. The other is a pause at the end of a clause.

*Why do geographers find mountains so funny?
Because they’re hill areas.

*What pencil did Shakespeare write with?
2B.

*Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
At the bottom.

*Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/4th.

*What did they do at the Boston Tea Party?
I don’t know, I wasn’t invited! 

* What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?
Summer!

* Why does the principal keep talking to me about having more “arty eye” (RTI)? I teach reading, not art.

*Does it count as differentiated instruction if I print their worksheets in different colors?

*Teacher: ‘Craig, you know you can't sleep in my class.'
Craig: 'I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could.'

* Teachers who take class attendance are absent-minded.

*What do you call a teacher without students?
Happy

*Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of
Pupil: Life imprisonment!

*Pupil: I don't think I deserved zero on this test!
Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you!

*Teachers deserve a lot of credit. Of course, if we paid them more, they wouldn’t need it.

*Where do door-makers get their education?
The school of hard knocks

*What do you call a teacher without students?
Broke … oh wait, that’s a regular teacher

*Teacher: Why have you got cotton in your ears, do you have an infection?
Pupil: Well, you keep saying that things go in one ear and out the other, so I am trying to keep them it all in!

*Kid comes home from first day at school. Mom asks, “What did you learn today?” Kid replies, “Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.”

*Pupil: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not
Pupil: Good, because I didn't do my homework

* There is one person in our district who is all about “No Child Left Behind”
Who’s that?
The bus driver

*What kinds of tests do they give witches?
Hex-aminations

*Teacher: You copied from Fred's exam paper, didn't you?
Pupil: How did you know?
Teacher: Fred's paper says "I don't know" and you put, "Me neither"!

To end the summer with a giggle, I've compiled and concocted 20 side-splitting (and maybe a little corny) teacher jokes to laugh our way back around to the weekend.

 

*What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?
Summer!

 

*Why does the principal keep talking to me about having more “arty eye”? I teach reading, not art.

0

 

Teacher JokesFor a quick giggle, we've compiled and concocted 20 side-splitting (and maybe a little corny) teacher jokes to laugh our way through next week.

* What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws. The other is a pause at the end of a clause.

*Why do geographers find mountains so funny?
Because they’re hill areas.

*What pencil did Shakespeare write with?
2B.

*Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
At the bottom.

*Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/4th.

*What did they do at the Boston Tea Party?
I don’t know, I wasn’t invited! 

* What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?
Summer!

* Why does the principal keep talking to me about having more “arty eye” (RTI)? I teach reading, not art.

*Does it count as differentiated instruction if I print their worksheets in different colors?

*Teacher: ‘Craig, you know you can't sleep in my class.'
Craig: 'I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could.'

* Teachers who take class attendance are absent-minded.

*What do you call a teacher without students?
Happy

*Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of
Pupil: Life imprisonment!

*Pupil: I don't think I deserved zero on this test!
Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you!

*Teachers deserve a lot of credit. Of course, if we paid them more, they wouldn’t need it.

*Where do door-makers get their education?
The school of hard knocks

*What do you call a teacher without students?
Broke … oh wait, that’s a regular teacher

*Teacher: Why have you got cotton in your ears, do you have an infection?
Pupil: Well, you keep saying that things go in one ear and out the other, so I am trying to keep them it all in!

*Kid comes home from first day at school. Mom asks, “What did you learn today?” Kid replies, “Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.”

*Pupil: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: Of course not
Pupil: Good, because I didn't do my homework

* There is one person in our district who is all about “No Child Left Behind”
Who’s that?
The bus driver

*What kinds of tests do they give witches?
Hex-aminations

*Teacher: You copied from Fred's exam paper, didn't you?
Pupil: How did you know?
Teacher: Fred's paper says "I don't know" and you put, "Me neither"!

To end the summer with a giggle, I've compiled and concocted 20 side-splitting (and maybe a little corny) teacher jokes to laugh our way back around to the weekend.

 

*What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?
Summer!

 

*Why does the principal keep talking to me about having more “arty eye”? I teach reading, not art.

0

Veteran's Day has always been one of those days I never got off school, so I never paid much attention. I'm guessing even those who do get the day off don't give it the attention it deserves. One of my coworkers just told me a story about his daughter:

Daughter: Woohoo, we have the day off!

Dad: What for?
Daughter: Veteran's Day
Dad: Do you know what a veteran is?
Daughter: No
Dad: Brief definition of veterans, and tells her that grandpa is one.
Daughter: Ok, can I put the radio back on?

Rather than let another Veterans day go by unnoticed, let's this opportunity to inform kids about the sacrifices and patriotism of soldiers and veterans.

Check out some classroom activities and guides at http://www1.va.gov/opa/vetsday/index.asp.

Here's a brief overview of how Veterans Day came to be:

In November 1919, President Wilson proclaimed November 11 as the first commemoration of Armistice Day with the following words: "To us in America, the reflections of Armistice Day will be filled with solemn pride in the heroism of those who died in the country’s service and with gratitude for the victory, both because of the thing from which it has freed us and because of the opportunity it has given America to show her sympathy with peace and justice in the councils of the nations…" Read more

In 1926, Congress officially declared November 11 to be Veterans Day.

On this Veterans Day, VA Secretary Dr. James B. Peake shares his thoughts about the holiday:

"Ninety years ago today, the guns fell silent in Europe. World War I – the “war to end all wars” – was over. Almost five million Americans served during that first modern, mechanized war. Our last living link with them, 107-year-old Army veteran Frank Buckles, observes this Veterans Day at his farm in West Virginia."

It is important, on Veterans Day, for all Americans to reflect on the service and sacrifice of our veterans, from Mr. Buckles to the men and women who recently fought for us in Iraq and Afghanistan. Their bravery, their resourcefulness, and their patriotism mark them as our nation’s finest citizens.

If you want to learn more about veteran organizations, get involved or make a donation, check out http://www1.va.gov/VSO/index.cfm?template=view

Commemorate the veterans or soldiers in your life in the comments section.

Veteran's Day has always been one of those days I never got off school, so I never paid much attention. I'm guessing even those who do get the day off don't give it the attention it deserves. One of my coworkers just told me a story about his daughter:

0

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning.

Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites. 

Character Education with Rudolph

Get

Use Rudolph to create a lesson about being different and special. Have students write down what makes them special (either adjectives for younger students or essays for older students) and share in group. Rudolph is a great tie in to teaching tolerance and anti-bullying messages.

Creative Writing & Clashing Cultures with Elf

Get

Buddy becomes an author, so why can't they? Students can try to write holiday-inspired stories.

 

For social studies, Elf demonstrates the culture clash that can take place between people from different homelands. Buddy only knows the life of an elf, with their rules and their clothes and their main professions. When he comes to America, he struggles to fit in. When have your students traveled somewhere where they felt out of place?

Simple Machines & Geography with Home Alone

Get

A Science-lovers dream. He uses all kind of simple machines and scientific principles to outsmart the bad guys, including using the conductivity of the door handle to burn their hands, a pendulum to propel paint cans and gravity, gravity, gravity.

 

There's also a geography connection because the family is in Paris. Where is Paris? How far is it from their home? What are ways the mom can take to travel there?

Practices Tenses & Economics A Christmas Carol

Get

Scrooge loves his money. What a great tie in to counting and even economic principals? Why do some people have lots of money and some people have very little?

 

The three ghosts also demonstrate the concept of past, present and future tense in a concrete way.

Language Learning with Holiday Favorites

 

The Nightmare Before Christmas
Most students know the general storyline for their favorite holiday shows. Watching holiday favorites in another language can help to bridge the gap for beginning language learners.

 

Share your favorite movies to share in class and how you work them into the curriculum in the comments section!

 

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning. Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites.

0

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning.

Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites. 

Character Education with Rudolph

Get

Use Rudolph to create a lesson about being different and special. Have students write down what makes them special (either adjectives for younger students or essays for older students) and share in group. Rudolph is a great tie in to teaching tolerance and anti-bullying messages.

Creative Writing & Clashing Cultures with Elf

Get

Buddy becomes an author, so why can't they? Students can try to write holiday-inspired stories.

 

For social studies, Elf demonstrates the culture clash that can take place between people from different homelands. Buddy only knows the life of an elf, with their rules and their clothes and their main professions. When he comes to America, he struggles to fit in. When have your students traveled somewhere where they felt out of place?

Simple Machines & Geography with Home Alone

Get

A Science-lovers dream. He uses all kind of simple machines and scientific principles to outsmart the bad guys, including using the conductivity of the door handle to burn their hands, a pendulum to propel paint cans and gravity, gravity, gravity.

 

There's also a geography connection because the family is in Paris. Where is Paris? How far is it from their home? What are ways the mom can take to travel there?

Practices Tenses & Economics A Christmas Carol

Get

Scrooge loves his money. What a great tie in to counting and even economic principals? Why do some people have lots of money and some people have very little?

 

The three ghosts also demonstrate the concept of past, present and future tense in a concrete way.

Language Learning with Holiday Favorites

 

The Nightmare Before Christmas
Most students know the general storyline for their favorite holiday shows. Watching holiday favorites in another language can help to bridge the gap for beginning language learners.

 

Share your favorite movies to share in class and how you work them into the curriculum in the comments section!

 

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning. Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites.

0

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning.

Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites. 

Character Education with Rudolph

Get

Use Rudolph to create a lesson about being different and special. Have students write down what makes them special (either adjectives for younger students or essays for older students) and share in group. Rudolph is a great tie in to teaching tolerance and anti-bullying messages.

Creative Writing & Clashing Cultures with Elf

Get

Buddy becomes an author, so why can't they? Students can try to write holiday-inspired stories.

 

For social studies, Elf demonstrates the culture clash that can take place between people from different homelands. Buddy only knows the life of an elf, with their rules and their clothes and their main professions. When he comes to America, he struggles to fit in. When have your students traveled somewhere where they felt out of place?

Simple Machines & Geography with Home Alone

Get

A Science-lovers dream. He uses all kind of simple machines and scientific principles to outsmart the bad guys, including using the conductivity of the door handle to burn their hands, a pendulum to propel paint cans and gravity, gravity, gravity.

 

There's also a geography connection because the family is in Paris. Where is Paris? How far is it from their home? What are ways the mom can take to travel there?

Practices Tenses & Economics A Christmas Carol

Get

Scrooge loves his money. What a great tie in to counting and even economic principals? Why do some people have lots of money and some people have very little?

 

The three ghosts also demonstrate the concept of past, present and future tense in a concrete way.

Language Learning with Holiday Favorites

 

The Nightmare Before Christmas
Most students know the general storyline for their favorite holiday shows. Watching holiday favorites in another language can help to bridge the gap for beginning language learners.

 

Share your favorite movies to share in class and how you work them into the curriculum in the comments section!

 

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning. Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites.

1

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning.

Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites. 

Character Education with Rudolph

Get

Use Rudolph to create a lesson about being different and special. Have students write down what makes them special (either adjectives for younger students or essays for older students) and share in group. Rudolph is a great tie in to teaching tolerance and anti-bullying messages.

Creative Writing & Clashing Cultures with Elf

Get

Buddy becomes an author, so why can't they? Students can try to write holiday-inspired stories.

 

For social studies, Elf demonstrates the culture clash that can take place between people from different homelands. Buddy only knows the life of an elf, with their rules and their clothes and their main professions. When he comes to America, he struggles to fit in. When have your students traveled somewhere where they felt out of place?

Simple Machines & Geography with Home Alone

Get

A Science-lovers dream. He uses all kind of simple machines and scientific principles to outsmart the bad guys, including using the conductivity of the door handle to burn their hands, a pendulum to propel paint cans and gravity, gravity, gravity.

 

There's also a geography connection because the family is in Paris. Where is Paris? How far is it from their home? What are ways the mom can take to travel there?

Practices Tenses & Economics A Christmas Carol

Get

Scrooge loves his money. What a great tie in to counting and even economic principals? Why do some people have lots of money and some people have very little?

 

The three ghosts also demonstrate the concept of past, present and future tense in a concrete way.

Language Learning with Holiday Favorites

 

The Nightmare Before Christmas
Most students know the general storyline for their favorite holiday shows. Watching holiday favorites in another language can help to bridge the gap for beginning language learners.

 

Share your favorite movies to share in class and how you work them into the curriculum in the comments section!

 

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning. Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites.

1

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning.

Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites. 

Character Education with Rudolph

Get

Use Rudolph to create a lesson about being different and special. Have students write down what makes them special (either adjectives for younger students or essays for older students) and share in group. Rudolph is a great tie in to teaching tolerance and anti-bullying messages.

Creative Writing & Clashing Cultures with Elf

Get

Buddy becomes an author, so why can't they? Students can try to write holiday-inspired stories.

 

For social studies, Elf demonstrates the culture clash that can take place between people from different homelands. Buddy only knows the life of an elf, with their rules and their clothes and their main professions. When he comes to America, he struggles to fit in. When have your students traveled somewhere where they felt out of place?

Simple Machines & Geography with Home Alone

Get

A Science-lovers dream. He uses all kind of simple machines and scientific principles to outsmart the bad guys, including using the conductivity of the door handle to burn their hands, a pendulum to propel paint cans and gravity, gravity, gravity.

 

There's also a geography connection because the family is in Paris. Where is Paris? How far is it from their home? What are ways the mom can take to travel there?

Practices Tenses & Economics A Christmas Carol

Get

Scrooge loves his money. What a great tie in to counting and even economic principals? Why do some people have lots of money and some people have very little?

 

The three ghosts also demonstrate the concept of past, present and future tense in a concrete way.

Language Learning with Holiday Favorites

 

The Nightmare Before Christmas
Most students know the general storyline for their favorite holiday shows. Watching holiday favorites in another language can help to bridge the gap for beginning language learners.

 

Share your favorite movies to share in class and how you work them into the curriculum in the comments section!

 

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning. Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites.

0

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning.

Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites. 

Character Education with Rudolph

Get

Use Rudolph to create a lesson about being different and special. Have students write down what makes them special (either adjectives for younger students or essays for older students) and share in group. Rudolph is a great tie in to teaching tolerance and anti-bullying messages.

Creative Writing & Clashing Cultures with Elf

Get

Buddy becomes an author, so why can't they? Students can try to write holiday-inspired stories.

 

For social studies, Elf demonstrates the culture clash that can take place between people from different homelands. Buddy only knows the life of an elf, with their rules and their clothes and their main professions. When he comes to America, he struggles to fit in. When have your students traveled somewhere where they felt out of place?

Simple Machines & Geography with Home Alone

Get

A Science-lovers dream. He uses all kind of simple machines and scientific principles to outsmart the bad guys, including using the conductivity of the door handle to burn their hands, a pendulum to propel paint cans and gravity, gravity, gravity.

 

There's also a geography connection because the family is in Paris. Where is Paris? How far is it from their home? What are ways the mom can take to travel there?

Practices Tenses & Economics A Christmas Carol

Get

Scrooge loves his money. What a great tie in to counting and even economic principals? Why do some people have lots of money and some people have very little?

 

The three ghosts also demonstrate the concept of past, present and future tense in a concrete way.

Language Learning with Holiday Favorites

 

The Nightmare Before Christmas
Most students know the general storyline for their favorite holiday shows. Watching holiday favorites in another language can help to bridge the gap for beginning language learners.

 

Share your favorite movies to share in class and how you work them into the curriculum in the comments section!

 

Just because you're showing a movie before the end of term doesn't mean you are abandoning learning. Here are a few ways to get the most educational value out of holiday favorites.

0

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